2025-11-26
Furious Fiction Challenge: Ex Factor
This was Furious Fiction's November Challenge:
- Each story had to take place on a game show.
- Each story had to include a metaphor describing the host.
- One contestant had to be eliminated in some way during the story.
- And each story had to include the words bundle, never, and violent.
Contestants were free to choose whether to write about an existing game show or invent one. I decided to base my story on a real show called 'Gelukkig gescheiden' (Dutch for 'Happily Divorced'). In this show, a divorced couple competes against each other with their new partners, trying to guess their kids' answers to—sometimes awkward—questions. The winning team earns a family vacation to a destination chosen by the children—without the losing ex.
Appartently, the jury loved my story, because it was selected for the November Showcase:
The jury wrote:
Many stories this month began with a ‘welcome back' moment but this one cleverly drops us mid-question into the action and we can’t help but be engaged in this battle of wills and waffles. Well, this has all the elements we were looking for in a made-up game show. The ever-eager crowd, the desperate contestants and of course the gleaming host. With a trio of similes (yes, they also count as metaphors!) and a big smile, this host commands the stage as things go from divorced to absurd. Perhaps the only thing that could improve this is to have called the show ‘Ex Factor'!
Now I feel like I cheated. The jury clearly thought I made up the show. Well, I didn’t. When introducing Belgium to foreigners, I always say it’s the “country of the absurd” (and that’s hardly an exaggeration). I did appreciate their suggestion to change the name of the show, though. Following the jury’s advice, I changed 'Happily Divorced' into 'Ex Factor' (EN25-016):
Ex Factor
“This question will decide everything, Nathalie. If you answer correctly, you and your new boyfriend Ryan get a chance to win a trip to Paris with your children.”
Nathalie’s palms glisten under the studio lights. A bundle of nerves, she clutches the armrest of her chair. The crowd falls silent as the host leans forward.
“We asked your boys a simple question,” he says, pausing for effect. “Who makes the best waffles for breakfast: you, or your ex-husband’s lovely wife, Tiffany?”
Nathalie’s tension melts away instantly. “That’s easy,” she smirks. “They like mine more.”
“Is that your final answer?” The host tilts his head like a bloodhound catching the scent of scandal. The camera pans to the children, two cherubs in matching denim jackets. They try to keep a poker face but can’t help giggling.
“Of course, I’m sure.” Nathalie throws a dirty look at Tiffany. “Her poorly toasted frozen waffles are no match for my homemade ones. I’ve been using my grandmother’s recipe longer than she’s been alive.”
The audience gasps, delighted by her cruelty.
The host beams like the Eiffel Tower on Bastille Day. “Let’s see if that confidence pays off. Kids, is your mother’s answer correct?”
Nathalie’s sons bounce in their seats. “No! Tiffany makes the best waffles in the world!”
The applause sign flashes. The crowd howls.
“Sorry, Nathalie,” the host says, feigning sympathy like a lawyer apologizing for his bill. “You’re out. Bill and Tiffany move on to the finale!”
Nathalie is baffled. “I never thought I’d be humiliated by my own kids,” she murmurs.
Ryan pats her back and subtly shifts toward the nearest camera, fixing the smile he trained for a toothpaste-ad audition.
The kids leap into Bill’s arms. Tiffany glows beside them as if she’s just won The Bachelor.
“Congratulations, Bill and Tiffany!” the host applauds. “You’re three questions away from a three-week all-inclusive vacation in Paris—with the kids!”
Nathalie finally comes to her senses. “He cheated!” she cries. “He cheated before, and he’s cheating now!”
Ryan tries to restrain her, whispering through clenched teeth, “Don’t ruin this for me.”
But Nathalie jerks free violently, nearly knocking her toyboy out.
The audience erupts, and the host smiles. “Time for some commercials.”
When the show returns, Nathalie’s seat is empty. Ryan remains, knowing every minute on air boosts his shot at a role lasting longer than his relationship.
“Welcome back for the finale of Ex Factor! But first… a twist,” the host announces. “Tiffany, you can choose who to play the final with: your husband, Bill, or his ex-wife’s younger beau, Ryan.”
Tiffany looks at Bill, then straight into the camera. “Nathalie was right. Bill is a cheater. Yesterday, he cheated on me with a bimbo named Destiny. I choose Ryan and a chance to win the trip to Paris—without the kids.”
“What an unexpected turn of events!” the host grins. “You’re out, Bill. And remember: love may be fleeting…”
“…but alimony is forever,” the audience chants.
Furious Fiction Palmares: This is my third short-list nomination (the previous ones were for 'A Mouse Called Elephant' (EN23-002) in December 2023, and 'His Fifth Wedding' (EN25-012) in July 2025). I also won fourteen long-list nominations. Together, that's 17 nominations, out of 32 submissions.
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- 2025-11-26:
Furious Fiction Challenge: Ex Factor - 2025-11-21:
If you're absent during my struggle - 2025-06-24:
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